Paradise

I've Never Been To Me
( Charlene )Hey lady, you lady, cursing at your lifeYou're a discontented mother and a regimented wifeI've no doubt you dream about the things you'll never doBut, I wish someone had talked to meLike I wanna talk to you.....Oh, I've been to Georgia and California and anywhere I could runI took the hand of a preacher man and we made love in the sunBut I ran out of places and friendly faces because I had to be freeI've been to paradise but I've never been to mePlease lady, please lady, don't just walk away'Cause I have this need to tell you why I'm all alone todayI can see so much of me still living in your eyesWon't you share a part of a weary heart that has lived million lies....Oh, I've been to Niece and the Isle of Greece while I've sipped champagne on a yachtI've moved like Harlow in Monte Carlo and showed 'em what I've gotI've been undressed by kings and I've seen some things that a woman ain't supposed to seeI've been to paradise, but I've never been to me


I took time out.
I asked for a break.
I don't know if it will be good, but I know this much. It has happened to me when I was turning 18, I was questioning where I was going. What I was planning. I remember being scolded back then. Like a good child, I shut up. I took it all in stride. But now, as I turn 25 the same recklessness builds inside me. The discontent, the confusion. But now, I took action. I asked for time for me. It was the hardest thing I could ever do. I don't think I can sleep at all tonight. It breaks my heart over and over again. But I have to be strong. I have to keep the main goal in focus here. I can't be side tracked. I'm turning 25. Is this where I envisioned myself to be 5 years ago? Where will I be 5 years from now? Am I happy with this person I've become? What events in my life have influenced me to be who I am? Am I the best possible version of me yet. Am I complete and whole and love myself for me?

I need time for myself. To wallow in just me. To discover who I have become and to love her. Only then can I be happy with what I am doing with my life, because I've accepted myself and no matter what I do professionally, wherever I may be, I will always be content.

I hope I didn't make a big mistake