I'm back in college. Up at 4am to study.
I'm hoping my Spanish has gotten at least a bit better (I will soon find out). Exams will take place on 08.06, Olè! Can't wait!
But for now, I better start...
"Querida Mayra"
Monday, May 30, 2011
Sunday, May 22, 2011
he vuelto
...
he sido una semana en Madrid.
Photos to follow soon.
It's been crazy!!!
I can't wait to share with you the trip.
he sido una semana en Madrid.
Photos to follow soon.
It's been crazy!!!
I can't wait to share with you the trip.
Thursday, May 12, 2011
Quiet
I had hopes for my new found friend...but when the friendship started getting complicated, I said I was going to walk away. This song is for him:
Quiet
Rachael Yamagata
Baby says I can't come with him
And I had read all of this in his eyes
Long before he even said so
Why go, I asked
You know and I know why
And it'll be just as quiet when I leave
As it was when I first got here
I don't expect anything
I don't expect anything
Take care
I've been hurt before
Too much time spend on closing doors
You may hate me, but I'll remember to love you
Goodbye
Don't cry
You know why
And it'll be just as quiet when I leave
As it was when I first got here
I don't expect anything
I don't expect anything
All the waves of blame arrange as broken scenery
As they steal your best memories away
What if I was someone different in your only history?
Would you feel the same
As I walk out the door
Never to see your face again
Never to see your face again
And it'll be just as quiet when I leave
As it was when I first got here
It'll be just as quiet when I leave
As it was when I first got here
I don't expect anything (5x)
I don't expect anything to change when I leave
Quiet
Rachael Yamagata
Baby says I can't come with him
And I had read all of this in his eyes
Long before he even said so
Why go, I asked
You know and I know why
And it'll be just as quiet when I leave
As it was when I first got here
I don't expect anything
I don't expect anything
Take care
I've been hurt before
Too much time spend on closing doors
You may hate me, but I'll remember to love you
Goodbye
Don't cry
You know why
And it'll be just as quiet when I leave
As it was when I first got here
I don't expect anything
I don't expect anything
All the waves of blame arrange as broken scenery
As they steal your best memories away
What if I was someone different in your only history?
Would you feel the same
As I walk out the door
Never to see your face again
Never to see your face again
And it'll be just as quiet when I leave
As it was when I first got here
It'll be just as quiet when I leave
As it was when I first got here
I don't expect anything (5x)
I don't expect anything to change when I leave
Monday, May 09, 2011
a year later...
Bro and F got married on this very day.
I was in Athens with Leo enduring a very crazy tradition of getting married.
It was like being thrown into, my big fat greek wedding.
This year, I'm in the office. Sleep deprived and stressed.
This is going to be a long week.
I was in Athens with Leo enduring a very crazy tradition of getting married.
It was like being thrown into, my big fat greek wedding.
This year, I'm in the office. Sleep deprived and stressed.
This is going to be a long week.
Sunday, May 01, 2011
one random Sunday afternoon
For the entirety of my stay in Rome, my friends, my good, close friends know one of my many quirks is social anxiety. May was especially good at trying to reassure me and put me at ease whenever she had parties. Mainly, she let me come over early to help her and that way when people start arriving, I've gotten used to the idea that I'm at a party and will have to interact socially.
Most people who know me at the office cannot fathom that I am a wallflower when it comes to huge ass parties or social gatherings. I just can't do it. More than 3 people I don't know, it's a problem.
So, Pyro told me he was in my area and that I should come over because he was with his friend and they were going to eat and bask in the lovely weather, etc. The house was a two minute drive from mine, so I considered it.
I actually showed up. Progress. I wanted to talk to Pyro about the other evening. But that didn't quite happen. As I approached the house, I saw that it was a rooftop gathering and there were people there. Heart palpitations going into override. I parked the car and called him.
He's like, where you at? It took me 5 minutes to tell him that I was not going to go up because of social anxiety. He said, he'd come down. He came down. He said hi and tried to pull me towards the building. I said no. Seriously. Heart in my throat. He thought I was kidding or exaggerating. I'm sure you're thinking the same thing too. I'm 29 and I shouldn't be shy. Well, I was.
We ended up arguing in the street because I wouldn't go up and he insisted. I walked towards my car. He had tried to wrestle me. He tried to pick me up wrestling style and I put up a fight. In the end, he won out. He said that everyone was waiting for us to eat and I told him to just go and have fun. He said he knew about 3 people there and the rest he didn't. There was no way in HELL, I was going to do this.
The reason I say he won out was because he literally picked me up from the street with me kicking and screaming and brought me up the first landing. I was impressed. He actually managed to carry me across two buildings and a flight of stairs. After that he had to put me down. He was tired. I wished to God there was a way for me to glue myself to the floor. I argued. He was about to pick me up. I argued that I left my bag and phone in the car and if I was going to go up I needed to get it first. He argued back that we show up and then he goes down to retrieve the bag.
I'm thinking, HELLO! I cannot show up to a party of complete strangers, and the only person I know is going to leave me?! No WAY!.
He didn't trust me. I said I was going to come back to that spot (I meant the first landing). I went to the car and I seriously had to think about it. I couldn't be rude no matter what, that was mom's first rule. Had I not shown up it was one thing. I was already there. So what do I do?
I get my stuff and send him a message, go up and have fun. I was walking slowly (very slowly back to the building). He runs outside expecting to see the back side of a car speeding away. Instead he saw me walking towards him. "I told you I'd come back".
To walk through the door was easy. To make it to the first landing, since I had glued myself to it earlier was fine. The next flight of stairs was harder to climb. Quite possibly because I was shaking and my heart was beating three times as fast in my throat. It had taken me 4 minutes to climb the stairs. He promised me that if I come up, I can go whenever I wanted. and I said, can I go after 30 seconds? He's like, sure. Just as long as you come up.
I met everyone, I didn't say anything. I stayed for half an hour and my host wasn't taking care of me all that much, he was leaving me alone quite a lot. Not fun. I walked into the house at a certain point and I ran into the owner (my now neighbor). I thanked him and we made small talk. And I told him, I don't think Pyro is going to notice me going. Maybe I can disappear. He's like, no, no don't do that.
He goes out and talks to Pyro who comes into the house very pissed. I said, I did my part. I came up, I ate, I met his friends. I smiled. I stayed. Now, I was leaving. He didn't insist anymore.
We left it at that. Thank god! It wasn't as bad but it was bad enough. How to get me into a party full of strangers? Apparently, you have to literally drag me in.
Most people who know me at the office cannot fathom that I am a wallflower when it comes to huge ass parties or social gatherings. I just can't do it. More than 3 people I don't know, it's a problem.
So, Pyro told me he was in my area and that I should come over because he was with his friend and they were going to eat and bask in the lovely weather, etc. The house was a two minute drive from mine, so I considered it.
I actually showed up. Progress. I wanted to talk to Pyro about the other evening. But that didn't quite happen. As I approached the house, I saw that it was a rooftop gathering and there were people there. Heart palpitations going into override. I parked the car and called him.
He's like, where you at? It took me 5 minutes to tell him that I was not going to go up because of social anxiety. He said, he'd come down. He came down. He said hi and tried to pull me towards the building. I said no. Seriously. Heart in my throat. He thought I was kidding or exaggerating. I'm sure you're thinking the same thing too. I'm 29 and I shouldn't be shy. Well, I was.
We ended up arguing in the street because I wouldn't go up and he insisted. I walked towards my car. He had tried to wrestle me. He tried to pick me up wrestling style and I put up a fight. In the end, he won out. He said that everyone was waiting for us to eat and I told him to just go and have fun. He said he knew about 3 people there and the rest he didn't. There was no way in HELL, I was going to do this.
The reason I say he won out was because he literally picked me up from the street with me kicking and screaming and brought me up the first landing. I was impressed. He actually managed to carry me across two buildings and a flight of stairs. After that he had to put me down. He was tired. I wished to God there was a way for me to glue myself to the floor. I argued. He was about to pick me up. I argued that I left my bag and phone in the car and if I was going to go up I needed to get it first. He argued back that we show up and then he goes down to retrieve the bag.
I'm thinking, HELLO! I cannot show up to a party of complete strangers, and the only person I know is going to leave me?! No WAY!.
He didn't trust me. I said I was going to come back to that spot (I meant the first landing). I went to the car and I seriously had to think about it. I couldn't be rude no matter what, that was mom's first rule. Had I not shown up it was one thing. I was already there. So what do I do?
I get my stuff and send him a message, go up and have fun. I was walking slowly (very slowly back to the building). He runs outside expecting to see the back side of a car speeding away. Instead he saw me walking towards him. "I told you I'd come back".
To walk through the door was easy. To make it to the first landing, since I had glued myself to it earlier was fine. The next flight of stairs was harder to climb. Quite possibly because I was shaking and my heart was beating three times as fast in my throat. It had taken me 4 minutes to climb the stairs. He promised me that if I come up, I can go whenever I wanted. and I said, can I go after 30 seconds? He's like, sure. Just as long as you come up.
I met everyone, I didn't say anything. I stayed for half an hour and my host wasn't taking care of me all that much, he was leaving me alone quite a lot. Not fun. I walked into the house at a certain point and I ran into the owner (my now neighbor). I thanked him and we made small talk. And I told him, I don't think Pyro is going to notice me going. Maybe I can disappear. He's like, no, no don't do that.
He goes out and talks to Pyro who comes into the house very pissed. I said, I did my part. I came up, I ate, I met his friends. I smiled. I stayed. Now, I was leaving. He didn't insist anymore.
We left it at that. Thank god! It wasn't as bad but it was bad enough. How to get me into a party full of strangers? Apparently, you have to literally drag me in.
I am a pop princess
There's nothing like hard reality to remind you of who you are.
I knew that there was something about him that would help me realize something about myself...and well, I realized that I thought I was an alternative person and he was everything about it. The truth is: I am not as hard core as I thought I was. Yeah the music, ok. The crazy obsession with everything dark, goth, vampires, ghost and death. Rock music and the like. I spent an hour with him and his friends. Taking in everything and realizing, that is NOT my world. It's not even a world I want to know. It's just not me. I thought my fashion sense was dictated by mom, be a princess, prim and proper look but I guess I'm used to it and that's how I am. Jeans with heals and a top. Nothing Rock, nothing punk, nothing alternative. Just normal and unassuming.
People come into your life for a reason, season or lifetime. I just figured out what he was doing in my life.
Leo lately has been telling me, I'm a princess, I shouldn't swear. I like pink (I abhor it!) and I keep saying, he doesn't know me at all. When in the situation of what I thought was my world, I realized, it's not me. Well, not completely. I would like to think that I'm hard core, bad ass...but I'm just normal and very simple. And, I actually like it.
I knew that there was something about him that would help me realize something about myself...and well, I realized that I thought I was an alternative person and he was everything about it. The truth is: I am not as hard core as I thought I was. Yeah the music, ok. The crazy obsession with everything dark, goth, vampires, ghost and death. Rock music and the like. I spent an hour with him and his friends. Taking in everything and realizing, that is NOT my world. It's not even a world I want to know. It's just not me. I thought my fashion sense was dictated by mom, be a princess, prim and proper look but I guess I'm used to it and that's how I am. Jeans with heals and a top. Nothing Rock, nothing punk, nothing alternative. Just normal and unassuming.
People come into your life for a reason, season or lifetime. I just figured out what he was doing in my life.
Leo lately has been telling me, I'm a princess, I shouldn't swear. I like pink (I abhor it!) and I keep saying, he doesn't know me at all. When in the situation of what I thought was my world, I realized, it's not me. Well, not completely. I would like to think that I'm hard core, bad ass...but I'm just normal and very simple. And, I actually like it.
making time for friends?
I spent Saturday out of the house...
Went with Charisma to the commy. Then we saw that most of the roads in the center were being closed off in preparation for Sunday's event.
Went to see Cristina for a bit.
Then went to help Jarie and Bubbles move. We then did some errands, going to Battistini to shop for Filipino food. I took them to my house where they were pretty scared to go in. I hadn't had a chance yet to clean or fix anything. We watched, How I Met Your Mother. And at 5.30 we headed out to Trastevere for aperitivo and dinner.
We headed to Art Two for an aperitivo. The last time I was there, was for Mayra's farewell drinks and I was a dork in front of ODJ. That was also the first time I had ever gone. From there, we moved to T-Bone Station where Bubbles was craving for Steak. By 9.30 I had dropped them off at the residence and I passed by Viviana's house to wish her happy birthday! I left the house at 9.15am, I didn't make it back home until 11 (alone!). I was exhausted.
Went with Charisma to the commy. Then we saw that most of the roads in the center were being closed off in preparation for Sunday's event.
Went to see Cristina for a bit.
Then went to help Jarie and Bubbles move. We then did some errands, going to Battistini to shop for Filipino food. I took them to my house where they were pretty scared to go in. I hadn't had a chance yet to clean or fix anything. We watched, How I Met Your Mother. And at 5.30 we headed out to Trastevere for aperitivo and dinner.
We headed to Art Two for an aperitivo. The last time I was there, was for Mayra's farewell drinks and I was a dork in front of ODJ. That was also the first time I had ever gone. From there, we moved to T-Bone Station where Bubbles was craving for Steak. By 9.30 I had dropped them off at the residence and I passed by Viviana's house to wish her happy birthday! I left the house at 9.15am, I didn't make it back home until 11 (alone!). I was exhausted.
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