the disillusioned dreamer

i feel down.
and i figure that down days happen.
so please, just let me be.
without knowing the why. it's hard to always be happy and patient and perky for you .... especially when you yourself are feeling a bit low...but please don't make me feel guilty for being human and having a down day.

i do it all the time, i manage to attract the people who will always take advantage of me. i feel a bit disillusioned and definitely disappointed. nevertheless, its ok, its part of life. i just have to keep my distance for a while otherwise there will be blood on the floor. (and all the walls, and probably the ceiling...)

i want to venet out... and i want to be hugged... but the one person i need right now won't understand... i just need you to let me be...

when you're all alone and sad and the friends you have who make you happy or just accept you for who you are, aren't around...where do you go? who can you turn to?

its also true that it's tiring to put up a front. the wall of the person you think is me. sad, i can't be myself with anyone here...my guard is always up somehow...

*sigh* that's my own fault.